Your Body Almanac

Parenting young children

Lifting, carrying, bending and rocking all day, on broken sleep.

Babies and toddlers are a heavy, wriggling load you lift dozens of times a day, often from the floor, a crib or a car seat at awkward angles. Thumbs and wrists take a beating, backs and shoulders get sore, and all of it happens on less sleep and less time for yourself.

01

Back strain from lifting and bending

Lifting a child out of a crib, a car seat or off the floor often means bending and twisting at the same time with the weight held away from your body. That combination loads your lower back. Bending your knees and bringing the child close before you lift helps.

SourcesPreventing Back Pain at Work and at Home (OrthoInfo, AAOS)Back pain (NHS)
Lift with your legsAs neededPlan the lift, keep the load close and bend at the knees, not the waist. Do glute bridgesDailyLift your hips off the floor to strengthen the buttock muscles that sitting tends to switch off. Do bird dogsWeeklyReach one arm and the opposite leg from hands and knees to build back and core control. Do dead bugsWeeklyA lying core exercise that trains your trunk to stay steady while your arms and legs move.
02

Thumb and wrist pain

Scooping a baby up under the arms with your thumbs spread wide strains the tendons on the thumb side of your wrist. The resulting pain, De Quervain's tenosynovitis, is common enough in new parents to be nicknamed "mommy thumb". Lifting with your palms and forearms instead takes the load off.

SourcesDe Quervain's Tendinosis (OrthoInfo, AAOS)De Quervain tenosynovitis (Mayo Clinic)
Vary your grip and postureDailySwitch hands, tasks and positions so the same muscles and tendons are not loaded for hours. Do tendon glides for your handsDailyMove your fingers through five positions to help the tendons slide smoothly through the wrist. Stretch your wrists and forearmsDailyGentle wrist flexor and extensor stretches for hands that type, grip or tap all day.
03

Carrying on one hip

Holding a toddler on the same hip day after day shifts your weight to one side and loads one side of your back and shoulder. Switching sides and using a supportive carrier spreads the load.

SourcesPreventing Back Pain at Work and at Home (OrthoInfo, AAOS)
Vary your grip and postureDailySwitch hands, tasks and positions so the same muscles and tendons are not loaded for hours. Hold a side plankWeeklyProp yourself up on one forearm to strengthen the sides of your trunk and hips. Strength-train twice a weekWeeklyWork all your major muscle groups on at least two days a week.
04

Running on broken sleep

Night feeds and early mornings leave many parents short on sleep for months or years. Short sleep affects mood, patience, focus and driving, and makes aches feel worse.

SourcesSleep and tiredness after having a baby (NHS)Sleep Deprivation and Deficiency (NIH National Heart, Lung, and Blood Institute)
Keep a consistent sleep scheduleDailyGo to bed and get up at the same times every day, weekends included, and aim for at least 7 hours. Set a caffeine cutoffDailyStop coffee, tea, soda and energy drinks by early afternoon, because caffeine's effects can last up to 8 hours. Make time for peopleWeeklyReach out to friends, family or neighbors each week, and build in regular shared activities.
05

Little time for yourself

Your own exercise, meals and friendships are often the first things to go. Short, regular bits of movement and asking for help when you need it are not selfish; they keep you able to care for others.

SourcesCaring for Your Mental Health (NIH National Institute of Mental Health)National Maternal Mental Health Hotline (HRSA)
Take a brisk daily walkDailyWalk at a pace that raises your breathing for at least 10 minutes a day, building up over time. Include protein at each mealDailySpread your protein across breakfast, lunch and dinner instead of saving it all for one meal. Make time for peopleWeeklyReach out to friends, family or neighbors each week, and build in regular shared activities.

When to see a professional

See a doctor or physical therapist for back pain that runs down a leg, numbness or weakness, or thumb or wrist pain that does not improve in a few weeks. Talk to a doctor if you feel hopeless, cannot sleep even when the baby does, or have thoughts of harming yourself or your child; you can also call or text 988 any time. If you are pregnant or had a baby in the past year, the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline is free and open 24/7 at 1-833-852-6262 (call or text).