Your Body Almanac

Stay-at-home parent

Lifting, carrying and caring around the clock, with little time for yourself.

Caring for young children full-time is physical work with no shift end. Lifting and carrying load the back and wrists, broken nights wear down sleep, and long days alone with small children can be isolating.

01

Back strain from lifting and carrying children

Lifting a child from the floor, a crib or a car seat, often twisted, and carrying them on one hip, loads the lower back many times a day. The load grows as they do.

SourcesBack pain (NHS)Preventing back pain at work and at home (OrthoInfo, AAOS)
Lift with your legsAs neededPlan the lift, keep the load close and bend at the knees, not the waist. Do glute bridgesDailyLift your hips off the floor to strengthen the buttock muscles that sitting tends to switch off. Do dead bugsWeeklyA lying core exercise that trains your trunk to stay steady while your arms and legs move. Strength-train twice a weekWeeklyWork all your major muscle groups on at least two days a week.
02

Wrist and thumb pain

Lifting a baby under the arms with your thumbs spread is a classic trigger for de Quervain's tendinosis, pain on the thumb side of the wrist that is common in new parents.

SourcesDe Quervain's tendinosis (OrthoInfo, AAOS)
Vary your grip and postureDailySwitch hands, tasks and positions so the same muscles and tendons are not loaded for hours. Stretch your wrists and forearmsDailyGentle wrist flexor and extensor stretches for hands that type, grip or tap all day. Do tendon glides for your handsDailyMove your fingers through five positions to help the tendons slide smoothly through the wrist.
03

Broken sleep

Night feeds, early wake-ups and sick children fragment sleep for months or years. Ongoing sleep loss affects mood, patience, memory and health.

SourcesSleep and tiredness after having a baby (NHS)
Keep a consistent sleep scheduleDailyGo to bed and get up at the same times every day, weekends included, and aim for at least 7 hours. Set a caffeine cutoffDailyStop coffee, tea, soda and energy drinks by early afternoon, because caffeine's effects can last up to 8 hours. Set a screen curfewDailyTurn off phones, laptops and TV at least 30 minutes before bed, and longer if you can.
04

Isolation and low mood

Days spent mostly alone with young children can be lonely. Low mood is common, and depression after having a baby affects many parents, including fathers.

SourcesFeeling depressed after childbirth (NHS)Loneliness (NHS Every Mind Matters)
Make time for peopleWeeklyReach out to friends, family or neighbors each week, and build in regular shared activities. Spend time outdoorsDailyGet 20 to 30 minutes in a park, yard or green space most days, walking or just sitting. Take a brisk daily walkDailyWalk at a pace that raises your breathing for at least 10 minutes a day, building up over time.
05

Your own health last

Children's needs come first, and parents often skip their own meals, exercise and checkups. Eating properly and keeping your own appointments keeps you able to care for others.

SourcesCaregivers (MedlinePlus)Healthy eating (NHS)
Include protein at each mealDailySpread your protein across breakfast, lunch and dinner instead of saving it all for one meal. Drink water through the dayDailyKeep a water bottle within reach and sip through the day instead of waiting until you are thirsty. Get a yearly checkupYearlySee your primary care provider for preventive care, the screenings and vaccines you are due for, and questions about your health.

When to see a professional

Talk to a doctor if low mood, anxiety or numbness lasts more than two weeks. If you have thoughts of harming yourself or your child, get help right away: call or text 988, or 911 if anyone is in danger. See a doctor or physical therapist for wrist pain that lasts more than a few weeks, back pain with leg numbness, or a gap or bulge along the middle of your belly after pregnancy.